During a Bible Study Session I attended, the subject of divorce came up. One member volunteered to check statistics on the reasons couples divorce. This is what she found:
Today’s Reasons for Divorce
- 57% Too much conflict and arguing
- 41% Getting married too young
- 31% Financial problems
- 36% Substance abuse
- 25% Domestic violence
- 12% Health problems
- 13% Lack of support from family
- 13% Little or no premarital education and religious differences
In a class on marriage I taught when I worked in a federal prison, I came up with ten tips for couples to handle disagreements. At the end of class, I presented each resident with a wooden plaque with these tips. I have also made decoupage plaques with these rules for wedding presents.
Couples Rules for Fighting Fair
- Decide what you are fighting about.
- Stay on the subject.
- Don’t bring up mistakes made a long time ago.
- Tell it like it is, and don’t pass the buck.
- Tell how you honestly feel about things.
- Get involved in the discussion. Listen to each other.
- Don’t run the other down or criticize his or her ability to do his or her job.
- Don’t call each other nasty names.
- Don’t hit each other.
- Don’t hit below the belt by criticizing the other’s sensitive spots.
- Think of different ways to solve the problem that can satisfy both of you.
- Say you’re sorry and make up.